Father's Day

A lot of women have shown their children that fathers are easily replaceable. It’s a deeply emotional and painful reality for so many dads who want nothing more than to be present, loving, and active in their children's lives. Now, don’t get me wrong; there are fathers out there who don't step up. Just as well, some mothers don't either. But when a mother fails, society and the children still find a way to excuse all her flaws and love her anyway, simply because "that's your mother, and you only get one." When it comes to the father, though? That’s a whole different story.

There are so many fathers out there who just can’t win for losing. Even taking accountability for your own part still isn't enough to get peace. That is an incredibly heavy and exhausting place to be. When you’ve stepped up, looked in the mirror, and taken responsibility for your side of things, which takes real strength, and the door to peace still gets slammed in your face, it feels like an impossible uphill battle. It’s that painful realization that you can only control your actions; you can't force the other side to meet you with the same maturity or grace. A lot of fathers are quietly carrying that exact same weight. They are trying to do right, trying to be there, but find themselves trapped in a rigged dynamic where the goalposts keep moving, and it feels like you're set up to fail no matter what you bring to the table. Eventually, you just have to accept that you have no other options.

There is a profound, painful grief in that kind of acceptance. But sometimes, accepting that you cannot change a bitter or unyielding situation is the only way to protect your own mind, spirit, and sanity. It doesn't mean you stop caring, and it doesn't mean you give up on your kids—it just means you stop pouring your energy into a brick wall that refuses to move. You have to save that energy for the moments, the texts, and the days when you can make a difference, even if they are few and far between. Happy Father's Day, fellas. Stand strong, redefine what a win looks like for yourself, protect your peace, and keep the door open

FatherHood

#Morninglyfe As I celebrated yesterday a significant milestone in my lyfe as a devoted father, having successfully raised three biological children who have graduated with honors I feel compelled to express my reflections on my past interactions. Despite tha challenges and personal growth that life has afforded me,

 I have come to realize that my association with a certain individual has had a profoundly negative impact on me While I had hoped that time would foster positive change and healing, it appears that our interactions have instead been marked by your sabotage and personal manipulation which end up causing major damage to me my external family it took my mother 30 years just to witness a child from her last son walk across a stage...all cause of you .... yea you... you hate me so much that your hated spill over on to my parents blocking even them.. ... it cool congrats to you

Nevertheless, #Allah gave me a second chance, and I am determined to move forward. I want to emphasize that tha damage caused by your actions is regrettable, yet through rehabilitation and personal growth with my wife, I am now able to fulfill a lifelong aspiration of truly experiencing fatherhood in its purest form. #God #Allah #PSA #bucketlist #DAD

Tha truth is

Being a Father is very hard for me as I missed out of most of my kid's lyfe with tha previous women in my lyfe.  Now to be honest with you All my Kidz means more than tha world to me but tha ones I had with my wyfe I try to channel that energy into celebrating being a father and what they mean to my community and family and not making tha mistake I have made in my past... (Which for tha record tha two mistakes I did make when it came to tha choice of women I decide to make into a mother was tha biggest issues I had to face when it came to my other kidz lyfe) unfortunately, tha hate they have towards me was tha cause of tha abstinence. There are so many brothers that are amazing fathers to their children, and children in tha community. Some are married, others are co-parenting…and some are single dads. Yes, there are more single dads out there than we realize. Many of them are not on child support, nor can they bring themselves to file such. They are just doing what they have to in order to raise their children. Yes, we understand there are men out there that are absentee fathers shit I was one of them, abusive or have terrible relationships with their children. However, there is a secret we tend to forget every 2nd weekend in May…there are many mothers out there that are absent, abusive and have terrible relationships with their children. It's not a fighting point, it’s a fact and one we don’t pay attention to because men do not highlight it. We are not out there on Mother’s Day exposing tha horrible experiences they have with tha mothers of their children…or their own mom. Instead, it’s a time in which we come together to celebrate the mothers of our communities, and tha women that embody that spirit. We uplift tha very idea of what motherhood is and tha importance of such. This is what makes Mother’s Day so beautiful.




In all fairness its time we celebrate (Father’s Day) with tha same care and celebration. If we aren’t talking about deadbeat moms (yes, they really do exist) in May…let’s not have that discussion on Father Day We can offer our children what you as mothers cannot. Father is our perfect balance and we need them. They can teach tha children a different kind of strength and compassion, and they are awesome problem solvers. They are protectors, and nurturers to our children in ways we could never be. Father can't do things that mothers can do best we can only do it to tha best of our ability, but  See us dads can offer something different and its detrimental when it is not praised for tha splendor it is. It's time to celebrate fatherhood and tha importance of it in front of your children. Let stop airing out dirty laundry.… and know you wouldn’t be here without one just as you wouldn’t without a mom. Take tha time to recognize tha men that father their children and then some. Tha ones that show up at school and mentor as many children as they can. Take tha time to celebrate all tha great things fathers do every single day. Don't believe me look around I bet you see a father at work  We cook, do homework, coach, comb hair, potty train, kill tha monster under the bed, read bedtime stories, demand accountability, teach responsibility, help establish standards, and they get it done with their own laid-back dad way.

Wishing upon a Star to find out where u r

When I see things in my lyfe that was taken from me due to selfishness reasons....I wish there was a #genie that really existed that can grant me a wish..... I would wish every time that I could be that bird flying hovering over tha sky's that's above you allowing me to observe and enjoy your growth.... Yah see in #lyfe I learn.... Tha #wrongs suffer from pain just as well as tha #rights... As human it natural from us to seek #payback #revenge and #etc.which is understandable but its #unforgiving when you include people are things that have nothing at all of to do with what people seek all those things for especially when what you hold a grudge against someone for something you claim you got and it much better.....#lyfers I Haven't seen my physical daughter in 14years... It hurts I ain't gonna lie I have try everything in tha book to erase this pain but fail every time ... So to all tha men and ladies their will be a day where there going to be a lyfe in both of y'all hands that can be hurt due to decisions...just an #FYI No one treat them self are a part of themselves like they treat are treated you and if they do that what a deadbeat is...

We need to be there.....

I would like to share some of tha challenges, struggles, and tha joys of being a father. From my child first step, to their first date As their father a relationship with my children is a very special one. Tha importance of a father’s role in shaping his children’s self-esteem is often underestimated and with that said Our children don’t come with an instruction manual either it's hard to figure some they shit out I swear.... But as their father we  have to figure a lot of things out for themselves when it came to raising our Kidz.... Shited to keep it real I had my 1st child  when I was 20 years old and my 2nd when I was 22. I was a very young man, with limited income, I lacked maturity, I was very selfish, and I had a lot of bad habits.

I remember sitting there one day watching my Daughters playing, and I became so overwhelmed with being that young, and having tha responsibility for raising two children at that age that I ran away and left my daughters behind. Think that I still had a chance to correct tha mistake by better myself I struggled with being responsible for raising my children, but I struggled more with being a role model for them, especially when I didn’t have my own lyfe together.....Raising children can be very tough, especially when you have them early in lyfe, and have limited resources. Preaching about not having kids until you’re financially stable, or married doesn’t help those who are already in this situation. I wasn’t married when my first child was born, and I surely didn’t have any money. Tha President of tha United States came from a single parent home with limited resources, which proves any child can achieve success as long as they have parents who love and support them. I decided to live ‪#‎lyfe‬ to learn how to be tha best at who I am as a man.... I don't never want to repeat tha ‪#‎mistake‬ I have made just want to correct as many as I can....before I say ‪#‎goodbye‬...... To tha guy that out there in these shoes now take it from me running away was not tha answer..... Stay and be there for your children;  As fathers we need to be there for our children regardless of what we are or what we have. My father was a man, who struggled with every aspect of his lyfe, but he never abandoned me, and he was always there for me until day he died. Our children don’t need us to be perfect, they just need us to be there!... I learn that tha hard way Fathers need to be tha best role models we can, and build our children up, not tear them down. As fathers we can tear our children down with our words, but we do it more by our deeds. Words are very important and words hurt. Tha positive words our children hear stays with them forever, tha negative words they hear can damage them forever. Tha relationship a father has with his children’s mother is very important.  People are not always compatible, and sometimes our feelings towards our spouses, or our children’s father or mother changes. Every day parents are faced with tha difficult decision of rather to remain in a relationship, or go their separate ways. If you and your child’s mother are separated, it is very important to work as hard as you can to maintain a positive and civil relationship with her mother. It is also important that we resist tha urge to say negative things about our children’s mother in front of them. Divorces, and breakups can be very tough, but we must think of tha impact our behavior has on our children. They are innocent victims of our failed relationships, and they usually wind up suffering the most, many times blaming themselves. It is our job to make our children know they are not responsible for our failed relationships.Being a father is tha most important job a man will have. Being a good role model and being there for our children can be tha difference between them having a lyfe of positivity and prosperity or a lyfe of struggle. Children who believe their fathers believe in them have higher self-esteem, and more self-confidence. Remember to love your children unconditionally, over-communicate with them, but above every thing else, be there for them. Tell them they can be, and encourage them to be whatever they want to be.  No goal is out of reach, no dream is too big if we give our children tha encouragement and support they need.  A father doesn’t need to be perfect; he does needs to be there,........

FatherDay ShaDow

As we move into tha shadow of another Fathers Day, much will be written and said. As a father of 5 girls and two sons I'm often reminded of Shakespeare’s words, When a father gives to his Kidz, both laugh. When a child gives to his father, both cry. Because of that I want dads to know that, wherever they are in their fatherhood journey, however unconventional being a dad may feel, as it does for me, that we are powerful beyond measure. We must actively seek ways to deepen our fatherhood experience....

 To accomplish that I made a checklists to follow 

Checklist#One

Become Maladjusted: In a sermon delivered at Lincoln University in 1967, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. confessed to being what he called a ‘maladjusted’ person. He said, in part, that he had not been able to get comfortable with a society that had become complacent in tha face of human hardship and suffering. Increase your dad power by becoming ‘maladjusted’. A ‘maladjusted dad’ is one who rejects what society says he should be and who commits himself to becoming what his child or children need him to be.

Checklist#Two

Write Affirmations: Journaling is a powerful experience. When that experience is chronicled through tha use of affirmations, it’s therapeutic. An affirmation is simply a written declaration.  An affirmation reinforces what we believe to be our reality and is prefaced with two of tha most powerful words in the human language: (I AM.) What you write after that says a lot about who you are, where you are going and what you are becoming.

Checklist#Three

Practice Forgiveness:Nothing kills dad power more than a grudge. Too often, due to conflict, single-dads hold on to long simmering resentment with tha mother of their child(ren). Don’t play that game. It’s suicide on tha installment plan.  Let tha next person have that. Tha longer you hold on to resentment, tha more it kills you.  Why? Because it’s robbing you of precious memories with your child... Trust me I am guilty of this as you are.. But I tell you this your happiness matters and you simply cannot be happy around your children when you are allowing anger to rule your spirit. Don’t accept tha adage ‘forgive but don’t forget’. That’s just as toxic. Radiate an attitude of lyfe energy and forgiveness. It will add years to your lyfe and lyfe to your years I am a living witness to that and always look for ways to deepen your fatherhood experience.